PUEDE SER

that when i went back to the christmas miniatures market next to the cathedral on december twenty-seventh to find the stalls being emptied out into trucks without ever having purchased a miniature christmas jamón for myself (although there’s no reason i shouldn’t have noticed the giant banners advertising the market through the twenty-third before then) -- that, in other words, the true meaning of christmas could be so simply elusive -- should be read as an omen…although whether that omen be good or bad remains to be read. and there, having been admonished by rilke on the evening of christmas day not to write if i could imagine life without writing, i was forced to wonder about the corollary of whether life should cease to exist for someone who couldn’t imagine life without writing but for whom it had been difficult to find the time. for example, if, say, a certain blog that had been building up to the holiday then found itself floundering at the holiday’s first peak, should that blog deserve its persistence. in other words, that we may not make it into the new year. or, that the mystery has just been too elusive to allow itself to have been so simply elucidated (compounded now by the impossibility of the jamón). so, you know, it’s possible. whatever that is.